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Assumptions about people’s pants

December 12, 2016

We’re all supposed to live in our own little echo chambers these days, so when I posted this tweet yesterday, I really wasn’t expecting it to be at all controversial.


Of course, it didn’t get controversial on twitter, because my twitter is a well crafted garden of superb people. It got weird on facebook, where I cross posted.

I mean, to my mind, there’s not really anything controversial here. It is creepy to make assumptions about other people’s junk. Given that we live in the world of the ‘trans panic’ murder defence, maybe that was a little optimistic, but as I said, I was posting in my echo chamber. I was expecting lols.

So, for the avoidance of doubt, here are some things that are and are not creepy:


  • Liking to look at pretty ladies
  • Liking to look at handsome gentlemen
  • Only wanting to have sex with people who identify as women and have a vagina
  • Only wanting to have sex with people who identify as men and have a penis
  • Being in one of the above two groups, finding out that your hot date doesn’t fit into the category you find attractive, and saying, ‘I’m afraid I’m not attracted to your body now that I know that. I’m so sorry. This sucks.’


  • Asking people about their genitals before it becomes relevant
  • Putting the genital configuration(s) you find attractive on your dating profile
  • Reacting with anger when someone discloses their genital configuration and you discover that it’s different to what you assumed
  • Saying that someone who is dating a trans person cannot be monosexual because of their partner’s genital configuration and that if they say so they are lying
  • Generally in any way making or acting on the assumption that a person’s gender presentation or gender identity must necessarily require a particular topography in their pants

I mean. I don’t think it’s that hard. Just don’t be a dick about whether or not someone has a dick.


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